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JCH » Blog » Kahnversations

A Note From a Post-Jewish Idolater

December 24, 2020 3:30 pm

Some people say that I am going to become very sick.

Some people say that I’m very likely to get COVID-19.

Some people say that I risk paralysis.

Some people say that I’m a willing dupe of the government.

Some people say that I have undermined my own DNA.

Some people say that I have a microchip in my bloodstream.

Some people say that my brain is controlled by a nano transducer.

Some people say that I act as an antenna for 5G transmissions.

Some people say that I am an idolater.

Some people say that I am, technically speaking, not fully human.

Some people say that I am no longer Jewish.

Some people say that I am willingly killing myself.

Every single charge above has been made about people like me. Every. Single. One.

What actually happened was that I just received a vaccine which will protect me from the coronavirus. 

I did it because I don’t want to get sick. 

I did it because I believe in being a responsible member of society. 

I did it because I accept the wisdom of the doctors who have guided me with accuracy all of my life.

I did it because refusal would have been selfish, dangerous, and stupid.

I did it because I know the difference between science and foolishness, between medical knowledge and conspiracy theories, between informed educated consensus and belief in the omniscience of excitable uneducated minds.

I did it because I believe in a merciful G-d Who both allows nature to run amok, and also grants humanity the wisdom to acquire dignity through taming nature.

As for all of those who believe that I committed the offenses enumerated above: make sure you tell everyone in your camp about my wickedness, foolishness, idolatry, non-Jewishness, post-humanness, irresponsibility, and – most importantly – the fact that I’m likely radioactive. If you’re wise, you’ll keep your distance.

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jewishcoffeeh Scott Kahn of JCH @jewishcoffeeh ·
13h

https://open.spotify.com/episode/6TYK7ATLlVIrVMk0vqOKyS?si=R2CWbU7iSeuwInurPnqXiw

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jewishcoffeeh Scott Kahn of JCH @jewishcoffeeh ·
5 Feb

Huge influence on... well, everybody.

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jewishcoffeeh Scott Kahn of JCH @jewishcoffeeh ·
31 Jan

54 years ago

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jewishcoffeeh Scott Kahn of JCH @jewishcoffeeh ·
30 Jan

It was an honor. Thank you!

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jewishcoffeeh Scott Kahn of JCH @jewishcoffeeh ·
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